My First Book Signing

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There comes a time in an author’s life when she stops authoring and starts marketing. After all, if you write a book and nobody reads it, does it still exist?

A book signing is a perennial tradition. It’s practically mandatory. So, like any aspiring author, I started jumping through hoops to make it happen.

I tried the hospital first. I knew they were going to be excited about the opportunity! They are my book’s world! I’m about to make them famous!

I asked about using a table in the cafeteria after lunch.

If you offer a donation, they said.

I make $1.59 for a paperback. The average book signing sells 3-4 books. Do the math.

I tried the gift shop.

They belong to a franchise. They have their own vendors. I’m not one of them.

I was feeling hopeless when I tried the library. They said yes. Sarah kindly showed me around, assigned me a table, and advised me to bring some wrapped sweets rather than my very special brownies.

Therefore on Saturday, July 13th, 2019,  2-4, I’ll host my first book signing at the Plattsburgh Public Library. I’ll be signing – and selling –  OVERDOSE if anyone stops by.

I’m starting to get the hibie-jeebies. What if nobody shows up? I’ll sit alone, looking dejected, waiting for somebody to speak to me!

Actually, it sounded kind of good. Everybody wants to speak to me in the ER: Patients wanting a script, families wanting an admission,  Etown sending me a patient, pharmacy telling me the patient is allergic to something he takes every day, the radiology tech telling me I’m X-raying the wrong leg.

I’m awful popular in the ER.

Not in the library.

How do I fix that? Wine, I thought. Emma and I, we love wine.

Not allowed.

I went for the next best. I got chocolate.

As to being alone, I invited my sister-wife, Sharon.

You didn’t know I had a sister-wife? I do. Sharon’s number one. I’m number three.

Sharing a husband,  even at different times,  creates a special kind of kinship. She understands where I’m at. I understand how she got where she’s at.

Back to the signing. Steve printed posters.

No place to put them up. For a country proud of her freedom of speech, there aren’t many places you can post stuff. None at CVPH. Nothing at Walmart. Nothing at Price Chopper, the post office or Sam’s.

The Co-Op was good to me. So were Condo Pharmacy, Dame’s wine store, and the cozy Keene library. Friends helped. There may be posters in places I don’t know of.  Or not.

Promoting a book is a lot like motherhood: You gestate her for a year, you birth her, then you try to find her playdates, while you’re pregnant with her brother.

I’m working on the raffle  – I have Audible codes to give away in exchange for reviews. I’ll buy flowers. I’ll put on makeup. I’ll do my best to look both comfy and professional, pretending that I don’t really care if anybody shows up.

Stop by will you? I’d love to see you there.

I’ll tell you about Mercy. Maybe even read a scene.

If you don’t get a book, I’ll autograph you a card. May be worth money someday!

Thanks for being here.

Be well, and, as always, keep in touch, will you?

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12 thoughts on “My First Book Signing

  1. I’ve loved your blogs ever since I read you first on KevinMD. I always look forward to them in my inbox. You’re funny and spot-on! I’m a newly retired PA who has worked in and out of several large metro hospital ER’s in 5 states. I miss the docs, nurses, staff, and camaraderie that I had the privilege of working with for 40 years. I’m buying your book on Amazon!

  2. My sweetest , dearest and beloved Rada,

    Please save a paper book with signature for me, so I can have it when will meet.
    Interim I’ll buy the kindle version, so I can maintain my house as minimalist as I can ( minimalist for me is different than one may expect, but better than it was 🤫).
    You are so full of imagination , and you can see the happy part and face of any situation. I adore you and hope this will be the feeling of any reader of your book!

    Good luck at the book signing ! I’m beside you in my thoughts in any moment of this earthly life. You are, and you’ll be an inspiration for me.

    Love you,
    Dana

    1. Love you, miss you, and I wish I was half as good as you say! Gives me something to live up to!

  3. Thank you for the position of sister-wife. We do have an odd connection and relationship. I love that about us! I also love your writing. Everyone should read OVERDOSE. I did – several times – and still loved it.

    People – come to the library. Buy the book. Sit with us and giggle, in hushed voices, at our weird conversations. We might even get tossed out of the library…

    1. We did come to the library.
      We did buy the book (actually 2).
      We did sit and talk and we didn’t even get thrown out …. lol.
      We did enjoy 🙂

      sharon and john schenkel

  4. I won’t be here, but still want to buy an autographed copy!! Good luck this weekend, I’m so sorry you ran into so many obstacles. Crazy!!!

  5. Love your sense of humor. If I didn’t live all the way out in CA, I’d come to your book signing. Cheers

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