I’m an ER doc, and proud of it. But I never mention it when I meet new people. Unless someone\’s fixing to die, I avoid it like the plague. “I work in a hospital,” I say. “Where in the hospital?\” “The ER. How about you?” That\’s a topic changer since most people would rather talk about themselves. …
I’m a doctor. And, like most medical professionals, I\’m a bad patient. Two years after my last appointment, I got a CTJ, \”Come to Jesus\” from my doctor. I called his office for a form. I needed proof that I don’t have tertiary syphilis. For my Thai visa. Why tertiary syphilis, as opposed to HIV, …
There comes a time in an author\’s life when she stops authoring and starts marketing. After all, if you write a book and nobody reads it, does it still exist? A book signing is a perennial tradition. It\’s practically mandatory. So, like any aspiring author, I started jumping through hoops to make it happen. I …
Mental Health in Today\’s America. “I can’t pee,” he says. \”How come?\” “They froze my urethra! They got mad that I didn’t listen to them. To punish me, they froze my urethra. Now I can’t pee.” “Who froze it?” “The voices.” The voices froze his urethra. He’s a good-looking man. His tan sets off his …
Art is art and money is money, no? Sort of. They’re interchangeable. From Leonardo, who didn\’t have to work for a living, (the Medicis subsidized him to create,) via Van Gogh, who had to use both sides of his canvas because he couldn’t afford to buy another, to the $86 Mil that James Patterson …
Last night, the heated debate on vaccination reached a boiling point. On March 26, 2019, in Rockland County, NY, unvaccinated children were barred from public places. Not only schools. Restaurants, supermarkets, worship places. They’re practically on house arrest. What about doctor’s offices and the ER? I don’t know. This is unprecedented. Rockland County is a 300K …
Humor is a shield in the ER. It helps us cope, so we laugh a lot. At each other, at ourselves, at the weirdness. Check these out. They are all real complaints of real ER patients. \”I have Bavarian cysts.\” \”My doctor said that I may have a blood clog in my leg.\” \”I have a stiff …
The heavy young man curled on his left side is in the ER for a pain in his backside. The sweaty blue dragon on his chest smells like fear. “It’s an abscess. I’ll have to open it. It’s gonna hurt.” “Can you put me to sleep? I hate pain.” I can. Should I? …
Every time I call a friend, all I have for them is more work. I’ve never yet called to say: “I hope you’re having a great day. Why don’t you take a break and have some fun? You’ve worked enough.” Nope. I only call to give them extra work. Whether it’s 2AM or …
The abuse of healthcare workers. “Kane County jail inmate Salters, 21, from Chicago, was at the Geneva hospital May 13, 2017, recovering from surgery after he ate part of a jail-issued sandal. He was in a patient room when Loomis unshackled Salters so he could use the toilet, according to an Illinois State Police summary …
